I used my cat to practice with my portrait lens and he killed it wtf
Omnivore diet / Grippy hands / Legs can walk in all direction but not fast / No tail / Conclusion human will not become crab / Human already crab
Frog left his tracks behind on a dewy windshield / This morning
What it shows is typing / What I’m actually doing finding the best sticker to send for 2 mintues
Can you explain this gap in your resume / Can you explain your high turnover rate
2 of the same monitor / 1 good and 1 cheap monitor
When you pretend to care about the teacher’s personal life to avoid work
When the app interrupts your game to ask for a rating / Tell me I’m pretty
When someone you just met starts telling you mad personal stuff
When I’m wiping my ass and the toilet paper comes back without a single shit stain / The ritual of purification is complete
What’s your music taste / Idk man if it sounds good I’m adding it to the playlist
At the gym / Me what does this machine do / Sir that’s a bench / Me perfect
The one cloud in the sky / Me driving straight at the sun on the way to work every day
The first person to see a Google Street View car passing by must have been like
When you’re having a peaceful time in the bathroom but then the person in the stall next to you takes the loudest nastiest dump you’ve ever heard
When your RGBified PC wakes from sleep in the middle of the night
When you log into your old xbox account and see all of your friends offline / 50000 people used to live here now it’s a ghost town
Therapy is expensive so I go here when I feel down
Me trying to flirt / The human experiment was doomed to fail the minute we prioritized our personal property over each other
Rome / Rome
Humans release water and oil in their skin to cool themselves down / Dogs
Pros of hyperfixation/Happy/Art ideas/Life is good/Cons of hyperfixation/I am going to blow up/All my art is of the same guy/If I don’t think about this 24 7 I get violent/Basically/Bladder/Fun/Hunger/Social/Energy/Hygiene
Person treats me with basic kindness / My emotionally abused ass thinking it’s romance / Do u like me
My roomba keeps going over to the doorstop and turns itself off by hitting the switch on the side / Shark