When your mom asks you why your friends refer to you as the Noob / Me / It’s a role given to me by the internet people
When you put headphones on with no music to avoid social interaction / It’s a simple spell but quite unbreakable
When you buy 6yo old a watch and it has a light / I want you to take a look at something
A toddler wants me to follow them somewhere / Me Hey where are you going / The toddler gidisjfjs dieisjxnc rieicje / Me / Of course that explains everything
Scotland yard tries to solve a murder case but couldn’t find any leads/Sherlock holmes after finding a few dust particles on a random chair/Of course that explains everything
Things I’m bad at Singing / Things I do a lot Singing
Me Things can’t possibly get any worse / Things / It’s cute you think that
Them God has a plan for everybody / God’s plan for me / Pain / That’s it
The planets looking back at you while you blame them for your bad behavior
Future mother in law so what will you cook for my son / Me / I’m making water
He’s got a point / Say something smart Kowalski / Sleep is just a free trial of death but with ads
Watching the full movie / Skipping to the good parts / Watching a 10-minute explanation on YouTube / Reading the plot on Wikipedia and imagining the rest
Perfect bookshelf doesn’t exist / Mystery
My leg day here is done / But you didn’t do anything
My 300$ laptop when I open a new Word document / You know I’m something of a jet engine myself
Me trying to be honest enough to form meaningful relationship but not honest enough to scare them off
Me as a grown adult bringing my plushie on a holiday trip because that’s my favorite companion
My brain maybe just turn the game off you have to be up in like 3 hours / Me / Shut up
Me/I’m going to start drinking more/My organs/Drinking more water right/Me/My organs/Drinking more water right
Me I’m finally gonna be productive today / Also me Damn it’s like a tiny stage and the burrito is doing a spin routine
How it feels to be a fan of a game that has no hope for ever getting a sequel or any sort of continuation
How I see normal cockroach / How I see when it starts to fly
How I deal with idiots now
As a guy renovating a house / This is how I spend my time / Looking for the fucking tool I had right in my fucking hands just one fucking minute ago 35% / Actual work 16% / Drinking coffee 8% / Planning thinking staring into space 16% / Trips to Home Depot 25%