Me no more your dog food bag says 1 cup / The dog the oreo box surely doesn’t say 16 oreos tricia but here we are
You who cry because you lost your cat / While your cat is out there
When you go to a fancy restaurant / And still end up ordering the chicky tendies
Why would my own brain ruin my day like who’s side are you even on bro
When you buy a new pair of glasses / You will pay the price for your lack of vision
When the sink is full of dirty dishes the trash needs to go out and the washer and dryer are full / I know what I have to do but I don’t know if I have the strength to do it
The vegetables in my freezer watchin me grab pizza rolls once again
When you look at memes to avoid your problems but the funniest memes are about problems / No matter how fast you go you cannot outrun yourself
Talk to a person who calls themselves boring / Look inside their soul / A kind and respectable human being with own hopes dreams and talents
On a scale of random hot beverage how are you feeling today?
Me at 16 mom I don’t need your dinner I’m not a kid anymore / Me at 23 mom did u cut the crust off my sandwich the way I like it
Me who just wants to leave work / Your computer requires updates
Me looking both ways down a one-way street because I have no faith in humanity
Me after somebody wakes me up early
Nobody:/Me 2 minutes after ordering food:/Sarcasm
Me using my parent’s fancy utensils / To make a 3-dollar sandwich for dinner
Live / Breaking news / Local fish in great mood today / 19 41 / The water tastes great and theres no predators around at the moment
Left my coffee out for a few days and my boy SpongeBob moved in
When your crush says I wish I could find someone like you / Smile in pain
Do you ever just feel like a rotisserie chicken?
Computer hacking in movies starter pack / Hit as many keys as possible while somebody behind you yells shut it down / Don’t ever touch the mouse / Don’t ever touch the keypad / I am invincible / Always finish computer hacking seconds before the danger
Any thoughts of suicide or hurting yourself?/No./Sneak 100