Lizardsister / Fruit fly diving straight toward the glass of apple cider vinegar mixed with dish soap already littered with the corpses of his kin
Finally / F13
Fake scenarios in my head / Me / Self isolation / I love you guys so much
Better take a shortcut / Uh-oh
A tree fell on my fence / Making the best of it while I negotiate the repair / Beware of dog
You’re only as evolved as the last thing that pissed you off
My brain You have so many tight deadlines So many things on your weekly schedule So many important jobs You have to get important work done / My hands
Baby pangolins look like they wanna talk to you but they also don’t want to interrupt you because you might be busy
Me / My brain / Me / My brain you know we really should do something productive today / Shut up
Me and my best friend choosing each other as partners so we can both fail the Chemistry project together
My dumbass gets out after 2 seconds of dodgeball / The one athletic guy who caught a ball / Come this is no place to die
Telling people you’re single / You’ll find someone / Have you tried tinder / Saying many have tried to date me and all have failed / Mystical / Empowering / Sword-in-the-stone vibes
Stealth takedowns in third person shooters be like
Seeing the same Reddit ad 5 times in a row / Realizing Reddit ads are personalized and the ad was about suicide prevention
When you wake up before your alarm rings you think you have time but it’s about to go off in a minute
Akari / Babyshoujo / Saw a thicc ass starfish at the aquarium today
Reviewing my friends resume and providing helpful comments versus reviewing my own resume
Me trying to sleep at 4am / My cats at the foot of the bed
Me I’m hungry / My bank account / I am so exquisitely empty
Anime warning keep the lights on and don’t stay near the screen / Attention / Me watching the anime
Me still awake in bed at 4 00 am / Pull an all nighter / Go to sleep anyways just for 2 hours of sleep
Me looking for a new match / The player who denied me a rematch in my last game
Me as a dad / We are winning son
Me after spending hours on my essay’s Introduction