Me checks if wallet and keys are still in my pockets / Me 2 seconds later / X doubt
Cat come pet me / Cat after 0.2 seconds
Car salesman slaps roof of car / Slaps roof of car / Slaps roof of car / Slaps roof of car / Slaps roof of car / Slaps roof of car / Slaps roof of car
Without a job / With a job / Broke and miserable
“Ass hair is useless” guys when they shave it and the ass sweat runs down their leg because the dam is gone / I get it now.
Babe it’s 11am time for your pain au chocolat / Yay
You have failed the English exam / Unpossible
Set your WiFi password to 24446666688888888 / So when your friend asks you for the the password just tell them it’s 12345678
The game when you were a kid / Also the game when you were replaying it
Thank you for contacting the abyss / Your scream is very important to us
Me flirting in the class / So what school do you go to
New relationship energy / Attention span / Bank account / Relationship capacity
I feel so alone I wish someone would care about everything going on in my head and love me unconditionally / I’m a terrible person No one deserves to be around this I need to get everyone away from me / My trauma brain 24/7 without breaks
My therapist leading me through guided imagery now imagine yourself floating serenely down the river / Me
Me / My not hungry girlfriend / My fries
Monday morning after party
Microphonophobia / Microphonophobia is a fear of microphones.
Other people it’s too far we should call an Uber / Me and that one friend who enjoys walking and long conversations
Aah refreshing 0% better / Me after my 15 min break at work / Me after sleeping a healthy 8 hours / Me at the end of a two day weekend
You are far away./The only way to pull the lever is to use the teleportation machine./If you do it will it be you pulling the lever?
Girl I dont have anything to wear / Closet
What you need to understand about recommending a show to me is that no matter how much we both know I’ll like it I can’t watch it until the Neurodivergence Department in my brain approves it / I don’t know when that will be and I don’t have any more control over it than you do
This is where I watched my parents die Vedal / I am your parent you dumbass
How ChatGPT looks at me after I ask it to analyze every interaction in my situationship again